libido

One of the more interesting "side effects" of taking testosterone relates to my libido. And one of the first physical changes that I've noticed was clitoral growth (which comes in very handy for a metoidioplasty). What this means is that not only is my libido turbo-charged, but my genitalia is uber-sensitive. This can make for a dangerous combination, when you get right down to it. Genetic men have it easy in a sense because once they are done with the human tangle, that's it. But for me, I am the energizer bunny. I can keep going and going and going. Now, most of the time, I think this is a pretty wonderful thing. However, thinking about what I want to do with the Love of My Life while taking someone's coffee order can be...distracting.

So now the game becomes one of self control. I suppose this is what every teenage boy goes through on his way to becoming a man. And, after all, I AM effectively that teenage boy coming of age in a 44 year old body. My advantage is that I have enough experience in social settings that I pretty much know what is appropriate. I'm certainly not perfect in acting appropriately but when I don't act as expected in social situations, I'm making a conscious choice.

Now, there are a number of things that go into my increased sex drive. I don't believe this is ALL testosterone-fueled (though that certainly does help matters along). One thing that my decision to transition has shown me is that I really am my own man. I am now strong enough to stand on my own which gives me so much more to share with the love of my life. I also think being comfortable in my own skin is a pretty powerful aphrodisiac in and of itself.